I have been a student of
psychology all of my adult years, and trying to find meaning and make sense of life. I have learned much, yet being visual, couldn't
quite come to a completely clear picture or image. Viewing a Joseph Campbell
video I learned that the psyche, or soul,
was considered a circle by Plato. A circle is appropriate because it is
natural, and very common in nature. From the shape of an atom, to water
droplets and bubbles, nuts and fruits, the moon, earth, sun, solar system, and
the universe, nature adores circles, spheres, and ovals. It is also one of the
strongest structures in nature, able to withstand great forces.
It seems we start without a
circle, no limits. The boundary arrives as we develop a personality that
appears separate and distinct from others and things. In contrast eastern
philosophy and now modern science teach that all creation is intimately
connected and interdependent, that there really is no separate self. As John
Muir said, "When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched
to everything else in the universe."
Campbell goes on to say that
this circle has a horizontal line across it that is the threshold of
consciousness. I would add this line begins at birth, as prior to that we were
essentially unconscious. As we developed physically and mentally our
consciousness also develops and expands, so the line lowers and circle enlarges.
Eastern wisdom also uses a
circle, but divided into equal shares of light and dark as evidenced in the Yin
Yang symbol. Note that this symbol often includes a white spot of light in the
center of the dark area and a dark spot in the center of the light area showing
that even though there are contrasting aspects in the soul of light and dark,
neither are absolutes and there is interconnection.
As we grow and develop, our
social conditioning develops as well, this Campbell describes as a square on
the center line. Part of this square is in the upper conscious area and part in
the lower unconscious area containing all of our unknown or repressed
conditioning. In cultures where community naturally takes precedence the
individual boxes is small and insignificant in deference to the greater good.
Not so in the west. In some people the square dominates the circle. This is ego
run rampant.
Campbell chooses a square to
relate to mans contribution as it is rare in nature, yet we are mad about them.
From books and boxes to rooms and buildings, squares and boxes are very common
in man's world. I believe the boxes relate very easily to the idea of ego,
having the "right" body, education, job, spouse, children, home, car,
and so on. I see the color of the boxes as changeable; perhaps red for rage,
green for envy, blue for depression, gray for doubt and confusion, white for
passion, black for fears and depression, and so on.
The unconscious box contains
all the ideas and beliefs of "the shadow;" the dark side of human
conditioning that are not consciously known as they are either obscured or
unseen. This box is much like the black box on airplanes, recording information
methodically over time. This box also moves through many colors and shades as
thinking and emotions "color" our perceptions.
The problems come when life
energy passes through these boxes and directs our attitudes, opinions, and
actions without our conscious knowing.
We usually have little or no choice in this, as early experiences leave deep impressions in our
bodies and minds well beyond what we are aware of that cause us to react
without thinking consciously, without realization.
These boxes grow as we collect
and protect our egotistical prizes, opinions, ideas, and beliefs, and shrink
with compassionate introspection and the resulting clarity. Also the walls of
the ego can become hard as stone or steel, impervious to influence and therefore
change. The ultimate goal is to look deeply and discover the contents that we
may come to acceptance of the negative aspects of ourselves to understand them
and build the necessary compassion and caring to facilitate significant and
lasting changes. Only then can the barriers become soft and permeable and doors
and windows open up in the walls our consciousness.
The problem with splitting off
the "positive" and "negative" sides of the soul so they
appear as absolutes is that it tears not only the soul, but all creation in
two. Now there is good and bad, right and wrong, devils and angels. Conflict
soon arises and opposing factions battle, at times becoming all out war. Life
is much too complex and mysterious for that. There are two sides, but only one
coin. It is the same with the soul. Peace can only come when we realize the connection
and interdependency of all our parts.
It is also easy to think of the
boxes as the home of evil, something we should destroy and discard. Yet
although it is somewhat of a Pandora's box, it is also a treasure chest filled
with gems of insight, so that past hurts that can become healings and rich fuel
for our journey. This is our "cross," but also can become our
resurrection and ascent to more heavenly realms.
These aspects point out that
the boxes are images of limits, that we are boxed in, trapped, and alone in
mental prisons. However these images are bounded only by our imaginations, and therefore
the possibility of transformation is always available and real. We are not
trapped and alone, there is help.
It is rarely fast, easy, or
painless, and in fact may require hitting numerous bottom or suffering shocks
and tragedies to shake us out of our entrenchment, but shift happens. People
can and do change, often in significant,
even radical ways slowly over time or suddenly in quantum leaps.
It often seems as if the
differing aspects of the soul have their own personalities. If we are
fortunate, our soul life begins as a wonder child, in awe and amazement of a
perfect and accommodating world resting in our mother or fathers arms, love
reflected in her eyes, and the emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual
nourishment intimately close. From here stages of development arrive and are
resolved or not.
For example, Erick Erikson describes these developmental
stages as: Eighteen
months to three years - trust vs. mistrust (drive and confidence) confidence) Three to five years - initiative vs. guilt (purpose) Six
to twelve years - industry vs. inferiority (method and competence) Twelve to eighteen
years - identity vs. role confusion (devotion and fidelity) Eighteen to thirty five years - intimacy and
solidarity vs. isolation (affiliation and love) Thirty five to sixty five - generativity vs. self absorption or
stagnation (produce & care) Sixty
five and on - integrity vs. despair (wisdom)
Should any of these stages fail
to be fully resolved and integrated, we may become fixated and haunted by them
the rest of our lives. Twelve step programs acknowledge a false self is created
to deal with the resulting angst and confusion, the "wounded child." As
we move into adulthood the voice and presence of an inner critic and higher
power may arise and judge us harshly, negatively, and viciously questioning and
crushing our self esteem on many levels from within. A host of defense
mechanisms, coping mechanisms, and survival skills may arise, making life ever
more troubled and difficult.
These problematic personality and
character defects would reside in the boxes as well. Hate, chaos, sorrow,
ugliness, and other problematic energies live there too. for some it seems the
heart is overwhelmed and sucked into the boxes also as evidenced by
psychopathic behaviors, lost in darkness
and misery. The overriding character of this aspect is, in a word, fear.
Thich Nhat Hanh teaches us we
must take egos tantrums in stride, like a tired and cranky child that should be
held and comforted until it calms down. He also see these dark energies as
house guests who must be taken in and attended to lest they force their way in
to wreak havoc.
Rumi very wisely addresses
these energies; "This
being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression,
a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome
and entertain them all! Even if they are a crowd of sorrows, who violently
sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He
may be clearing you out
for some new delight. The dark thought, the shame, the malice. meet them at the
door laughing and invite them in. Be grateful for whatever comes. because each
has been sent as a guide from beyond."
Eckhart Tolle calls these upsets
"pain body," and advises it is simply an illness, deserving of
compassion rather than resentment. Twelve step considers these character
defects, or simply disease or insanity, and works to resolve and heal them. A
Course In Miracles tells me it is simply fear in one of its many disguises, a
call for love, and so an opportunity to answer with compassion and loving
kindness.
The soul circle is much like
the ocean where above water it can be clear and peaceful at times, or powerful
dark storm clouds can bring wind, rain,
waves, thunder, and lightening. Underwater mountains and valleys contain
abundant, diverse, and bizarre creatures as well as the wreckage of past
misadventures. Scientists now find these storms play out below the surface as
well as above just as our "storms" do consciously and unconsciously,
so that below the surface another whole world goes on filled with life and
mystery.
The circle or sphere and the threshold
of consciousness are also analogous to the human body as the frenzied,
compulsive, thinking of "monkey mind" goes on in the realm of
consciousness in our heads. The mind is also somewhat airy and fickle, blown
about on the winds of life's travails. Hope is not lost here as although we can't
see or control the wind, we can adjust our sails.
Below, the body has its own intelligence,
it's own "thinking," that is much more wise and calm. Eckhart Tolle
advises that if the messages of the body and brain conflict, listen to the
body, it knows the truth. The body is also more connected to the world due to its
many senses. It doesn't even need much attention to heal wounds or illness, as this
usually occurs naturally.
Like the body, the heart is
also below the threshold of conscious, somewhat under conscious influence but
well beyond our control. The heart can be hard, heavy, and black, or light,
sensitive, and vulnerable. A friend gave
me the image of the heart as wounded and
sore, an angry clenched fist of stone or steel.
This hardened heart can also be
bound in leather straps and covered in layers of armor. Brene Brown notes how
quickly and easily we "armor up" to protect ourselves, yet her
extensive research found our courage stands is in direct proportion to our
ability to be vulnerable. She is now an expert on shame and vulnerability and
author of best-selling books and hugely popular TED talks well worth a look.
Recovery is about carefully
peeling off the layers, and melting the heart of stone or steel until it
returns to flesh and blood, and then relaxing the angry fist until it becomes a
helping hand. How do we do this? For us at Cowboy Dharma it takes a combination
of Twelve Step and spiritual meetings and study, developing a loving
relationship with our inner child and parent, our Higher Power, art, music,
nature, and others that comprise the "Sanity Files." Our hope is they
will inspire you to nurture your own sanity files and also find inner and outer
hope, help, healing, and happiness.
Through prayer and meditation
we can recognize when the ego, pain body, or character defects are activated
and in charge and step back to become an observer rather than a reactor to realize
that we can choose again, we have a choice!
We must stop, look, and listen. If it all seems just too dramatic, unfair, and
unacceptable to handle, we may yet ignore the raucous screams of ego and listen
to the still, small voice of the infinite wisdom, presence, and power of our
Higher Power.
This becomes easier and more
effective as we learn to practice mindfulness throughout the day. For me, prayer
is a conversation with my Higher Power; mentally, verbally, and through journaling.
Meditation is finding my center in calm and quiet, my "Being." Insanity
is very prevalent in the world, but sanity is also very real and near, waiting
within, always available through my wonder child, loving inner parent and
Higher Power.
A major benefit of this image
is it helps me understand there are differing dynamic "compart-
ments" functioning within the psyche. Therefore I can be angry or
suffering about difficulties on one level, yet feel authentically grateful and
happy on another. The image here, is being tossed about by a storm, yet still
anchored in the deep calm, peace, and contentment below the surface that is
always vibrant and alive.
For me it comes back to the
first three steps of twelve step programs of which I am a longtime devotee. 1:
We are powerless over others and our compulsive thinking, that our lives become
unmanageable. 2: We can come to believe a power greater than ourselves that can
restore us to sanity. 3: We can decide to turn our will and our lives over to
the care of God, as we understand God.
I know this can be difficult,
especially if our youth was filled with people who were angry, jealous,
negative, critical and otherwise abusive as this transfers over to our Higher Power.
It can take many years and much hard work to change, but it can be done. Healing
and wholeness is just as real as the pain and suffering. No one can do it for
us, but together, we can do it!
These steps also mirror the
Four Noble Truths of Buddhism somewhat as; 1: Life is difficult. 2: The
difficulty is due to ego attachment and aversion. 3: Letting go of ego is the solution.
4: Freedom and happiness lie in the virtuous
eight fold paths of: right view, right speech, right livelihood, right mindfulness,
right thought, right effort, right action, and right concentration.
So what is the point, the
"bottom line?" If you accept
this image of soul, now imagine the circle expanding and contracting as we
identify with the individual self or spreading out to encompass all creation.
Next the boxes also growing or shrinking and the walls getting thicker and
thinner as they flash through bright and dark colors in reaction to events
perceived or imagined. This is life! If we try to freeze life energy into walls
and hold back the flow, it won't work for long. Life must flow!
It is up to you. Will these
dark forces run your life? Or are you willing to not only stop feeding them,
but also bear the pain of looking into them to see what they are made of, dismantle
and dissolve them, and live for greater good? The key is to keep watch, be the observer,
recognize when ego is arising and not take it personally or seriously, and then
do the work of healing. Again, it won't be fast, easy, or painless, but it is
worth it! You are worth it!
This image is helping me see with
the spotlight of mindfulness to clear away the fog of uncon- scious past
conditioning and really be present here and now for myself and others in the
best possible way. I am not trapped. I can choose again, and again, and again. No
longer must I strive to simply survive, I am now free to thrive and live a truly
full, blessed, and abundant life!
Lastly, I'd like to leave you
with a few paragraphs from a workshop we did called True Happiness:
Your circumstances and
situation are of no consequence in the realm of the infinite of which you are
an essential part. In truth, we are not
separate from others, nature, or Higher Power, rather we are an important
aspect of all creation, intimately connected to and part of everything that is,
was, and ever will be. We certainly don't have to go it alone, it
wouldn't work anyway; a full and abundant life is always a group effort. It does take a village to raise a healthy child (and
adult!), and connections and community.
Your job here is to become your
brightest, best, and most beautiful self! To be who you are, to connect with the love, joy and beauty of your soul, and
spread it
throughout the universe endlessly. There is nothing missing, broken, or flawed;
you are complete, whole, and perfect as is. You have been suffering from a case
of mistaken identity, mistaking yourself for the problems, disease, and
insanity of the world. Choose now to identify with the solutions, well being,
and sanity of your wonder child, loving inner parent, and True Self.
You are not little, alone, or insignificant. You are the greatest,
most glorious gift God has to give, a priceless treasure! The most beautiful,
awesome, and amazing thing in existence! Not a peon or a slave, rather, a king or a queen with a kingdom you must rule. You are
an angel, here to sing the praises of humanity and creation with your own
special vision and voice, so everyone who will listen will hear and join in the
joyous song. Deep inside
you know it's true! Tell
yourself in the mirror and shout it out to the world!
You are the creative principle that built the pyramids, mapped astronomy,
discovered chemistry and mathematics, dared
surgery, painted every masterpiece, and wrote every symphony. In fact, you and your life are a
symphony, an ecstatic celebration of music, dance, and poetry; YOU are the greatest work of art
ever made, and all of creation gives you a rousing cheer and standing
ovation!!!
Copyrights
11/17