Accessing the Sanity Files
For those using mobile devices, it's best to scroll down and click on "View Web Version" to access the Sanity Files in the green box on the right. This allows you to choose the file that interests you most rather than relying on posts listed from newest to oldest—many of the oldest contain some of the most valuable insights.
What's It All About?
In short, the "Cowboy" (Western side) celebrates the best of contemporary Western thought—Twelve Step Recovery, psychology, Eckhart Tolle, Brené Brown, Joseph Campbell, Erik Erikson, and others. Dharma, often defined as "the right way of living," represents thousands of years of ancient wisdom, primarily from Eastern spiritual and philosophical traditions. Additionally, we honor profound influences from European thinkers and Middle Eastern sages, drawing inspiration from across the world—from the Far East to the Wild West.
Roads to Recovery
These paths lead to true help, hope, healing, and happiness in a world that often feels sad, sick, and chaotic. Suffering is not solely physical—it affects us mentally and spiritually as well, sometimes in severe or even devastating ways. Heart, mind, body, and soul may feel broken and torn as we face personal and collective trauma, abandonment, and loss. In response, we may turn to distractions and addictions in an attempt to numb the pain, patch up the wounds, and push forward as best we can.
It's Simple
As we recover, we transition from struggling through bad years, months, or weeks to experiencing only bad days, hours, or moments. Recovery itself is simple: we must stop blindly running in the same old circles. It’s time to open our eyes and ears, hearts and minds, and embrace the light of a new day—welcoming a new way of living with awareness. By recognizing the habitual thought patterns and behaviors ingrained in us by dysfunctional families, societies, and cultures, we can begin to transform our lives. Just like exercise or learning, even small, consistent efforts can lead to major, life-changing—and life-saving—growth and fulfillment.
Regaining Your Superpowers
In the Super Powers Sanity File, you’ll discover an essential truth: on our own, we may feel powerless, but with the aid of our Higher Power, we have access to the unlimited wisdom, presence, and energy of the universe. Like a lamp, vacuum, or Tesla, we must connect to the ultimate power source, switch on, and take action. Through awareness, prayer, and meditation, our abilities—love, peace, joy, beauty, and more—are supercharged exponentially as we align with our divine and limitless source.
What Is Recovery?
Recovery is the process of reclaiming what was lost or stolen and returning to a full state of health. For many, what was taken was a joyful, fulfilling, and loving upbringing, leading to what Thoreau called "lives of quiet desperation." We searched and bargained for love and meaning, only to feel empty. The childlike qualities of enthusiasm, curiosity, adventure, and others may have been stamped out—but they are not lost forever. They can be reclaimed, nurtured, and embraced now, and for the rest of our lives. Recovery is not just about healing physically and mentally; it's about striving for a full and vibrant state of well-being.
Becoming Your Own Loving Parent
Beyond growing up in a caring, kind, and loving environment, we needed to learn essential life skills—relationships, self-care, cooking, cleaning, and helping others. Many enriching experiences could have shaped us as well, including singing, dancing, music, art, sports, and exercise. Did we cultivate a passion for history, math, or nature? How about an understanding of politics, economics, morality, or spirituality? Whatever we didn’t learn as children—whatever sparks our interest now—can be explored with the curiosity and enthusiasm of a child. (More on these in the Inner Child and Loving Inner Parent sections.)
Let's Get to Work!
Healing may be simple, but it is not fast, easy, or painless. Overcoming a lifetime of conditioning—and possibly trauma, neglect, or abuse—requires time, hard work, and perseverance. But you are worth it. Healing can feel like treating a deep, infected wound—painful and overwhelming at first—but necessary to achieve true, long-term health. Yet have no doubt: if you look and listen deeply and commit to the process, both you and your life will transform.
From Hurting to Healing to Helping
It’s easy to deny, delay, or avoid problems. But as we face them and clean up the mess, our world improves, and we become more capable of helping and inspiring others. Some people struggle to believe they are worthy of healing or hesitate to put in the work, but your family and friends need you. The world needs you. It’s time to step into your boldest, brightest, most brilliant and beautiful True Self—right here, right now.
Accepting Help
One of the most challenging aspects of recovery is accepting help. It is said that "troubles shared are halved, and joys shared are doubled," and we find this to be profoundly true. Healing and fulfillment cannot thrive in isolation—we must share our experiences with safe and wise counselors, family, friends, or support groups to restore or create the interpersonal connections we may have lost. If you have truly supportive people in your life, that’s wonderful! However, at Cowboy Dharma, we find Twelve Step programs like Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACA) to be an invaluable source of support, community, and healing—at no cost. Be sure to check out the Sanity File link.
No Mud, No Lotus
There are very few simple, tried-and-true formulas for living, but we have a few. One, of course, is The Twelve Steps, as mentioned above. Another worth sharing comes from renowned meditation master Thich Nhat Hanh in his book No Mud, No Lotus. His formula states that focus and concentration lead to clarity, insight, and understanding, which ultimately bring wisdom and transformation. Though simple in theory, this practice is deeply effective when applied to any challenge. It’s well worth exploring and integrating into daily life.
From Surviving to Thriving
At Cowboy Dharma, we recognize that pain and suffering are not just inevitable—they are necessary, even vital, for a full life and experience. Healing comes from embracing and learning from hardship. As Sir Winston Churchill put it: "We shall draw from the heart of suffering itself the means for inspiration and survival." We seek out and apply any and all skillful means to foster healing, recovery, and renewal—with our Higher Power, ourselves, and others. As part of this journey, we leave behind toxic relationships and situations to discover that positive, life-affirming connections are not only possible—they are deeply rewarding.
All Roads Lead to Home
The Sanity Files help us make sense of this chaotic world. They begin with foundational elements—a Higher Power, Nature, the Inner Child, and Adult States—guiding us toward clarity and peace. Other Sanity Files explore deeply impactful areas of life, such as music, art, beauty, prayer, meditation, and wisdom from great masters. Throughout this journey, the key question to keep in mind is: What makes sense of your world, brings you peace and joy, and helps you find true happiness?
Sanity in a Crazy World
Through years of reading, recovery meetings, discussions, retreats, workshops, and deep soul searching, we have gathered insights that have led to clarity, wisdom, and peace—all of which we now share with you. We have organized our learnings into evolving categories that continue to expand over time. These paths are powerful, transformative, and more than capable of rising above the rush and chaos of modern life. These are the Sanity Files, listed to the right. Many posts are written from a first-person perspective, because we believe, as Carl Rogers once said:
"What is most personal is most universal."
Your Beautiful Adventure Awaits
No matter your past, or the pain and suffering you have endured, the healing and adventures ahead far outweigh the struggles behind you—if you are willing to confront and understand the difficult, dysfunctional thinking and behaviors that have shaped your experiences. As you gain wisdom, you will learn to transcend and transform these patterns, unlocking the freedom, joy, and happiness you truly deserve. We have seen this truth unfold countless times, as everyday people reclaim their lives in extraordinary and meaningful ways.
An Attitude of Gratitude
Despite the troubles in our personal lives and the challenges we see in the world each day, we believe we are outrageously blessed. In fact, practicing gratitude is so beneficial that it’s featured as one of the Sanity Files you’ll find later on. Taking in the big picture—the abundance, beauty, diversity, and intelligence of life across time and cultures—can help steady the soul amid life's hardships. When we add the magnificent endeavors of humanity—symphonies, dance, music, art, and the sciences—gratitude becomes not just natural but deeply true.
Achieving Greatness
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." Arnold Glasow noted, "Success isn't spontaneous combustion—you must set yourself on fire!" Similarly, John Wesley declared, "Set yourself on fire with passion, and people will come from miles around to watch you burn!" Seeing firsthand the life-changing and life-saving transformations that occur when people have the right support and tools is truly inspiring. The struggles of the past pale in comparison to the big, bold, bright, and beautiful adventures ahead. So don’t be afraid—embrace your enthusiasm, ignite your passion, and fuel your recovery and future.
Filling Your Toolbox
The Sanity Files serve as a toolbox for us—filled with our most essential, frontline tools for navigating daily life and handling difficult moments. Like auto repair, we use these tools to stay tuned up when things are running smoothly and make repairs when challenges arise—especially during breakdowns. The most important step is creating your own personalized set of tools to manage daily life and overcome obstacles. Over time, you may find that some tools become more useful while others fade, allowing your toolbox to evolve with your journey.
Finding the Right Tools for You
There are many tools and resources available here, and if you find ours helpful, that’s great! However, what truly matters is finding what works for you. Hopefully, some of our suggestions resonate and find their way into your toolbox—but don’t hesitate to add your own. Your toolbox is yours to build. Feel free to add or remove content anytime as you discover what holds value, meaning, and usefulness for you.
Exponential Synergy
Each tool works not just individually, but collectively, in what we call exponential synergy—meaning their impact is multiplied when used together. Synergy allows these practices to achieve far more than they could alone, and the compounding effect enhances their power even further. Try one or all to see what resonates most. Our hope is that you find peace, love, joy, and beauty—whether here or elsewhere.
Easy Does It
The scope of what we offer may feel overwhelming at first. Take your time—small steps, small bites. The goal is simply to find something of value that works for you. To start, it may be best to focus on the first seven Sanity Files (after the introduction), as they tend to be the most impactful for healing. But as always—begin wherever you feel drawn. Your healing and happiness matter most, so follow your heart.
The "I" of the Storm
Many of us suffer from a case of mistaken identity, confusing ourselves with the problems, negativity, and brokenness of our families, societies, cultures, and the world. We may feel shattered, having lost essential parts of ourselves, and in response, we have lived through a false self for years—perhaps even decades. Cowboy Dharma is a response to this identity crisis, a call to mend and heal our brokenness. It invites us to reclaim our True Self, to rise once more in the health, wholeness, and happiness that is our birthright.
Embracing the Light and Dark
Love and fear, life and death, light and dark—embrace it all. Every aspect of existence, whether heavy or light, is part of life, part of you, and part of a Higher Power. While these forces—whether an inner parent, a wounded child, or a judgmental Higher Power—can seem difficult and demanding, they are ultimately striving to help us, however twisted their methods may appear.
Imagine a devil—or demon, or dragon—on one shoulder, but it's really just a robot playing out old and often dysfunctional programming. On the other shoulder is an angel—a guardian or protector. The dark parts of ourselves are just as integral as the light, and they have much to teach us. The real question is: Who is in the driver’s seat? Which voice will you follow? Which energies will you feed? Paradoxically, it is only when we accept, welcome, and embrace the difficult, negative parts of ourselves that they loosen their grip and become allies rather than adversaries. As Carl Jung famously stated, "One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious."
Heart First
For too long, we have lived from our heads, allowing thoughts, ideas, opinions, and beliefs to shape our world while matters of the heart take a backseat. We seek to reverse this orientation, leading with the heart whenever possible. Reasoning is essential and has its place, but love, kindness, and compassion should always come first. If your head tells you one thing, but your heart and body say another, it is almost always wiser to trust your gut. Too often, intellect takes precedence over emotion, yet we find that a life led heart first brings the deepest wisdom. The most powerful and effective results emerge when head and heart align—when the "heart-mind" takes the lead.
Feelings First
As the Industrial and Scientific Revolutions ushered in the Age of Reason, the passion and vitality of the Renaissance gave way to a colder, more rational, and sometimes heartless human perspective. Cogito, ergo sum—"I think, therefore I am"—has often left us feeling empty and disconnected. In response, Romanticism arose in Europe, seeking to restore emotion and intuition to their rightful place. Yet, its impact on the "wild" West seems less pronounced. The women's rights, civil rights, and peace movements helped steer us back toward a more balanced way of being, but the work is far from finished. This is part of that effort—and, hopefully, so are you.
Feel It to Heal It
Ask yourself: Do you truly feel the love of your Higher Power, inner child, inner teen, and other internal personas? If not—why not? Life is not meant to be merely an intellectual exercise; it is meant to be fully experienced. How can you deepen your sense of kindness, care, and compassion for yourself and others? This is your task now—to find ways to truly feel love. Love for God, your inner child and teen, your inner parent, teacher, leader, and for the beauty of nature, music, science, art, and beyond—with all your heart, mind, body, and soul.
From Me to We
Perhaps our most dysfunctional orientation is the fixation on I, me, mine. A newborn sees rightly—as one with its mother (WE)—its gaze perfectly attuned from the breast to the mother’s face, exchanging adoring looks. But soon, the "terrible twos" arrive, filled with "no, no, no" and "me, me, me." Thus begins an often lifelong journey of self-absorption and self-serving behavior. In this transformation, WE became ME. But turn the word ME upside down, and it returns—just as we should—to WE.
Living Inside Out
For too long, we have been living backwards, focusing our energy and sense of worth on the external world. Eastern philosophy describes this dynamic through the Eight Worldly Winds: loss/gain, praise/blame, fame/shame, and pleasure/pain—all different faces of the same game. Now, we have the opportunity to shift our focus inward—to live inside out. By looking deeply within ourselves, through the intentional orientations of Higher Power, our inner child, teen, and adult states, we can transform our primary reality. From this vantage point, we cease to be mere reactors to life and instead become actors—choosing our own paths with awareness and intention.
Freedom is at Hand
Morris Massey once said, "What you are is where you were when," a truth that still holds. Early life experiences and relationships shape us, leaving deep, often unconscious patterns that influence our thoughts and behaviors throughout our lives—unless we seek awareness and understanding. By confronting our deeply rooted beliefs, we gain the wisdom, freedom, and power to transform. We are not doomed to reliving a dysfunctional past if we choose otherwise—again, and again, and again.
As George Santayana wisely observed, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." Thus, we find it worthwhile to explore, process, and ultimately release the burdens of our upbringing and past struggles. We are determined to face it, feel it, and heal it. Or, as Mary Mary put it in their 2000 worldwide hit: "Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance! You broke the chains so I can lift my hands!"
Whatever It Takes!
We are willing—and encourage you—to talk, cry, laugh, play, share, walk, create art, or dance to reconnect with what’s troubling you and what inspires you. Whatever it takes to thaw a frozen heart, shatter a heart of stone, and break free from the dam of fear, bitterness, resentment, anger, jealousy, depression, anxiety, regret, loneliness, addiction, isolation—whatever weighs you down—to live openly, honestly, and authentically.
A Revolution of the Soul
This may sound revolutionary—because it is. Perhaps even a little wild. But many, if not most, need a revolution right now. They need the hope, healing, and profound transformation this sea change provides. Are you ready to stop living backwards—to turn yourself inside out and upside down—and finally embrace the full, authentic, meaningful life you deserve? Then read on, because the greatest adventure of all awaits you: reclaiming your True Self.
What Do You Think and Feel? We’d love to hear from you. Feel free to email us at dharmacowboy@gmail.com with insights and experiences that have helped you along your journey.